How much Xmas gift money is appropriate for teachers? (2024)

My 11-year old goes to a private elemenary school. One of the parents is organizing to buy some group Xmas gifts for 4 teachers who teach the kids. I asked her what the suggested amount should be but she wouldn't give me a straight answer.

I am thinking about $25 to $50 per teacher so somewhere between $100 to $200 altogether. Am I in the right ball park?

Thanks

$25 per teacher seems appropriate. Nationally, burnout is high among teachers whose job is as difficult as it is invaluable. I'd describe this not just as a gift but an investment in something beyond oneself.

[Edit] giving too much to teachers ($50, $100, etc.) could also be problematic; remember, teachers have evaluative authority over your children, and should feel free to provide accurate grades (good and bad) without having to feel indebted by an excessive gift. Best wishes.

I think this is very individual and does depend on the teacher.

I am a nurse who actually became a nurse educator in an ROP program my last 12 years.After teaching for a year I nearly left, it was far more difficult and time consuming than I ever imagined. I started to think back on my kids teachers and wished I had appreciated them far more back then. I honestly had no idea how difficult teaching is and standing there with 35 students each day.

My students were all seniors in high school who planned on going into Nursing. Each year about 75% of my students brought gifts of thanks usually at Christmas and year end. Some wrote letters, others small gift cards or small items like a candle. For me, it meant a great deal. I retired last year and I still have students contacting me via email and text keeping me updated on their nursing experiences. I just received an email today from at student in Medical School at Boston Med. He graduated 5 years ago.

My point is if the teacher is one that your student and you appreciate, a small gift is always appreciated.

hmw wrote: ↑Tue Nov 22, 2022 10:52 pmOne of the parents is organizing to buy some group Xmas gifts for 4 teachers who teach the kids.

A group Xmas gift or a cash Xmas bonus?

Sometimes, these parent organizers pocket a bit of cash. I'm pretty sure.

Give what you want. Assume it makes it to the teachers. Or give to them directly.

runner3081 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 23, 2022 7:08 amThe room moms collect $30-$50 per student. The teacher walks away with around $500 for Christmas in gift cards/gifts and another $500 for teacher appreciation week.

Private school?

hmw wrote: ↑Tue Nov 22, 2022 10:52 pmMy 11-year old goes to a private elemenary school. One of the parents is organizing to buy some group Xmas gifts for 4 teachers who teach the kids. I asked her what the suggested amount should be but she wouldn't give me a straight answer.

I am thinking about $25 to $50 per teacher so somewhere between $100 to $200 altogether. Am I in the right ball park?

Thanks

My wife is a Public schoolteacher in a modest/diverse district and has never received cash and I think would be uncomfortable if she did. She does get coffee shop gift cards ($10 or so) or trinkets like water bottles, coffee mugs, magnets, one time we got champagne flutes (? Lol), etc.

$25 gift card to a place like Target. That way if the teacher is uncomfortable with gifts, it can be used for classroom supplies.

I'm not a fan of group collection but recognize I'm weird.

If it's a group gift with someone organizing it, then the amount you choose. If directly, a GC, as has been suggested in a chosen amount. Definitely, give something to those who have about as much influence on the future of your children as anyone other than family.

Tim

Our PTO organizes this every year, for the teachers and all the staff. We participate, but at a minimal level.

IIRC, we usually do $20 for each of the teachers our daughter has each day (Math and ELA); $5 for the special subject teachers (Art, Music, PE, Spanish), the school counselor and school social worker, and the lunch/recess monitors; $10 for each of the office and custodial staff. We do not gift the principal.

It adds up quickly.

epicureme wrote: ↑Tue Nov 22, 2022 11:50 pm[Edit] giving too much to teachers ($50, $100, etc.) could also be problematic; remember, teachers have evaluative authority over your children, and should feel free to provide accurate grades (good and bad) without having to feel indebted by an excessive gift. Best wishes.

No gift amount would ever make me consider compromising my integrity, however, I feel a little uncomfortable getting gifts that are $50+.

+1 to "anything more than $25 is too much". I don't think $50+ gifts "buy influence", but it is just a lot for most people (assuming you're not in some expensive private school where flaunting wealth is half the game).

We have done everything from cards and candy to gift cards, ranging from $1-$25. This should be "the thought that counts". One time my work donated time to a "teacher free store" and we were able to give all the teachers a shopping voucher to that - and it was the one time I got hand written feedback from a teacher saying "thanks". So that's a very creative option if it is at your disposal.

This is so awkward! Even and and expensive private school there are likely a number of kids there who are on a scholarship or grant whose parents could not afford to contribute to a group gift like that.

I don't have a good answer.

You should also probably google if there are any state or district imposed limits on gifts. Illinois bans gifts in excess of $100 cumulatively across the year from any single source (it is not clear to me if a PTA or other parent collective is considered a single source). In addition to making things awkward you might actually put the teachers job in jeopardy if they accept the gift.

We usually stick to Starbucks gift cards. Typically do $5-20 - $20 for the teacher, $5-10 for specials (art, music, gym) and others who frequently interact with our kids (bus driver, school secretary). Kids are in elementary - not sure if this will continue in middle / high school (my guess is the kids will eventually be too embarrassed to give their teachers a card).

I’m a public elementary school teacher. $25 gift cards are typical, $50 is generous, and $100 are rare but I do get them at times.

I receive a total of around $1k in gift cards during the year, mostly during the holiday season and for teacher appreciation week. This total amount represents a (very) small percentage of my salary. The contributions of any one parent toward the total are much smaller still. My point is that the sum in question is not significant enough to either make me feel awkward or make me feel indebted to anyone. All it does is make me feel appreciated and happy. It also helps around the holidays when I buy gift cards for the secretaries and custodians at work and give extra money to my housecleaners to show my appreciation to them as well.

A gift is best given with an open heart and not out of some sense of obligation. If you don’t feel like giving a gift, then simply don’t do it. If you choose to, though, you’ll help make the world a little brighter around the holidays.

[Merge here - mod mkc]

It's that time of year again. I know many public schools have limits on how much to gift to teachers for the holidays, but any parents of kids in expensive private elementary schools on this forum?

I feel bad that the teacher (who is amazing) works very long days and earns $40k/year in a VHCOL area without the lifetime pension/healthcare of a public school system, as she helps load and unload kids from a parade of cars worth 4x her salary. She is so loving and patient with the children, and she cheerfully answers questions via text/email 24/7/365, buys her own supplies, spends her time at home prepping for class projects, etc. I feel she is underpaid, but obviously I have zero control over that.

Do you think there's an upper limit to what's appropriate? $250? $500? $1000? more?

Note: It's still pass/fail at this grade level, so there's no concern for "buying" grades.

If there is a limit, unlikely that is something we would know vs you simply asking the school administration.

DW is a teacher, the gifts she enjoys the most are things that benefit her class room and a note. For example a gift card to Lakeshore Learning, Target, or other store where teachers are often buying classroom supplies directly. If you provided something like this, in my opinion the limit would be different than if you were giving the teacher cash or a restaurant gift card. I would expect nearly no limit if it directly benefits the classroom and students.

My question for you, is your understanding of this teachers comp accurate? Is there a reason for it, does she not have to be credentialed at this private school? Certainly there are schools that pay less and others that pay more, but $40k for what you describe is crazy low for the VHCOL areas I am familiar with. I don't see how this private school can be sustainable if teachers are being paid 50% of comparable public school teachers (I'm thinking of CA teacher comp).

I think $250 is probably the upper limit of what would not make the teacher uncomfortable.

I’d also ask the expensive private school why the teacher is buying supplies out of pocket? Maybe a Staples gift card in addition to the cash gift if the school doesn’t step up on supplies.

happyjuice8000 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:05 amIt's that time of year again. I know many public schools have limits on how much to gift to teachers for the holidays, but any parents of kids in expensive private elementary schools on this forum?

See Also

What is a good gift card amount for a teacher?

I feel bad that the teacher (who is amazing) works very long days and earns $40k/year in a VHCOL area without the lifetime pension/healthcare of a public school system, as she helps load and unload kids from a parade of cars worth 4x her salary. She is so loving and patient with the children, and she cheerfully answers questions via text/email 24/7/365, buys her own supplies, spends her time at home prepping for class projects, etc. I feel she is underpaid, but obviously I have zero control over that.

Do you think there's an upper limit to what's appropriate? $250? $500? $1000? more?

Note: It's still pass/fail at this grade level, so there's no concern for "buying" grades.

(no money)
Thoughtful handwritten Christmas and Holiday cards with your family picture.

j

happyjuice8000 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:05 amIt's that time of year again. I know many public schools have limits on how much to gift to teachers for the holidays, but any parents of kids in expensive private elementary schools on this forum?

Do you think there's an upper limit to what's appropriate? $250? $500? $1000? more?

I have never given a monetary gift to any of the teachers of our children's private elementary school strictly as holiday giving. I have though asked during parent teacher conferences throughout the year if their classroom is lacking something and have purchased those things. I have bought lots of books for their library, school supplies and once a nice microscope. They have always been very gracious and it supports the entire class and perhaps future classes and not the teacher directly.

TomatoTomahto wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:53 amI think $250 is probably the upper limit of what would not make the teacher uncomfortable.

I’d also ask the expensive private school why the teacher is buying supplies out of pocket? Maybe a Staples gift card in addition to the cash gift if the school doesn’t step up on supplies.

I started asking around today, and it's apparently geographically dependent. One friend whose child goes to a private school in Manhattan says that $1000 is common at their school. Another friend who lives in the Midwest says that $100 is typical at their private school. So I think your suggestion sounds about right.

lthenderson wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 10:41 am

happyjuice8000 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:05 amIt's that time of year again. I know many public schools have limits on how much to gift to teachers for the holidays, but any parents of kids in expensive private elementary schools on this forum?

Do you think there's an upper limit to what's appropriate? $250? $500? $1000? more?

I have never given a monetary gift to any of the teachers of our children's private elementary school strictly as holiday giving. I have though asked during parent teacher conferences throughout the year if their classroom is lacking something and have purchased those things. I have bought lots of books for their library, school supplies and once a nice microscope. They have always been very gracious and it supports the entire class and perhaps future classes and not the teacher directly.

That's a great idea!

windaar wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 10:03 amI know a private school teacher and have heard a little about this. For some reason the quantity of gifts is inversely proportional to the grade level; parents of kids in grade school give much more than parents of kids in high school. A $100 gift is considered very generous and appreciated. Much more than that might be awkward or weird, or seen as if a favor is expected. A $20 - $50 Target or Amazon card is always appreciated. Teachers get lots of sweets like expensive candies and cookies, etc., and they don't need more of those. "Number 1 Teacher" coffee mugs and the like go straight to Goodwill because they've gotten a half a dozen of those a year since they started teaching.

I wonder what happens to all those "#1 Teacher" mugs at Goodwill? Are they re-gifted? LOL!

Ron Ronnerson wrote: ↑Wed Nov 23, 2022 10:27 amI’m a public elementary school teacher. $25 gift cards are typical, $50 is generous, and $100 are rare but I do get them at times.

I receive a total of around $1k in gift cards during the year, mostly during the holiday season and for teacher appreciation week. This total amount represents a (very) small percentage of my salary. The contributions of any one parent toward the total are much smaller still. My point is that the sum in question is not significant enough to either make me feel awkward or make me feel indebted to anyone. All it does is make me feel appreciated and happy. It also helps around the holidays when I buy gift cards for the secretaries and custodians at work and give extra money to my housecleaners to show my appreciation to them as well.

A gift is best given with an open heart and not out of some sense of obligation. If you don’t feel like giving a gift, then simply don’t do it. If you choose to, though, you’ll help make the world a little brighter around the holidays.

I realize this is an old thread, but it is time for holiday gift cards once again.

Last year I gave the teachers Amazon gift cards for $100 and their aids $50 each. Our kids are a handful and I want to express my gratitude which is why I did this. I hope I did not make them uncomfortable. One of the aids thanked us.

A time to EVALUATE your jitters: | viewtopic.php?p=1139732#p1139732

DoubleComma wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:52 amIf there is a limit, unlikely that is something we would know vs you simply asking the school administration.

DW is a teacher, the gifts she enjoys the most are things that benefit her class room and a note. For example a gift card to Lakeshore Learning, Target, or other store where teachers are often buying classroom supplies directly. If you provided something like this, in my opinion the limit would be different than if you were giving the teacher cash or a restaurant gift card. I would expect nearly no limit if it directly benefits the classroom and students.

My question for you, is your understanding of this teachers comp accurate? Is there a reason for it, does she not have to be credentialed at this private school? Certainly there are schools that pay less and others that pay more, but $40k for what you describe is crazy low for the VHCOL areas I am familiar with. I don't see how this private school can be sustainable if teachers are being paid 50% of comparable public school teachers (I'm thinking of CA teacher comp).

I just went based on an ad posted for a full-time certified teacher at the school. I googled what the national average is. Here is what I found....

"Full-time teachers in public schools earned about 30 percent more than private school teachers, pulling in an average annual base salary of $61,600, compared with $46,400, according to the survey from the National Center for Education Statistics."

mw1739 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:32 am$1000 seems a bit like charity to me vs. a gift. I'm going to guess my wife spent $100 per teacher on gifts this year, which seems reasonable to me. They also send requests or keep Amazon lists for class supplies, which we usually buy a few things from.

Amazon lists for class supplies is a good idea!

happyjuice8000 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 10:42 am

TomatoTomahto wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:53 amI think $250 is probably the upper limit of what would not make the teacher uncomfortable.

I’d also ask the expensive private school why the teacher is buying supplies out of pocket? Maybe a Staples gift card in addition to the cash gift if the school doesn’t step up on supplies.

I started asking around today, and it's apparently geographically dependent. One friend whose child goes to a private school in Manhattan says that $1000 is common at their school. Another friend who lives in the Midwest says that $100 is typical at their private school. So I think your suggestion sounds about right.

Makes sense ... Midwest private school and $100 here

$1000? or more? If that's the norm, I would really encourage a conversation with your private school about raising tuition rates and teacher salaries, instead of having students supplement $20,000 of the teacher's salary in the form of a gift card.

In my upper-class Midwestern public school, the norm ranges between $20-$100. $100 or more would make a lot of teachers feel uncomfortable. We gave home-room teachers a $50 Target gift card this year, had the kids write them a note thanking them, and put it in an envelope with our family holiday card.

Teachers really don't want coffee mugs or candles. They all have too many.

Mrs. is a school teacher. Honestly a nice card from the student telling them that they are appreciated is about the best gift she can receive. We have more unused coffee gift cards and mugs laying around than we know what to do with.

A second best gift would be to ask the teacher if he/she needs any supplies for the classroom. Most parents would be dumbfounded how many supplies teachers pay for out of pocket.

Glockenspiel wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 11:13 am$1000? or more? If that's the norm, I would really encourage a conversation with your private school about raising tuition rates and teacher salaries, instead of having students supplement $20,000 of the teacher's salary in the form of a gift card.

What, you are opposed to bringing "tipping culture" to education

miamivice wrote: ↑Tue Nov 22, 2022 11:23 pm$0 per teacher

^ This.

A private school our kids attended for a while had a staff bonus fund that was (as far as I know) equally distributed to faculty, administrative, maintenance staff, etc. We would throw in $200-300 each December.

I personally thought the school should just be budgeting higher compensation and bonuses and raise tuition accordingly. But for what it was, I thought this handled the issue well. I feel like cash gifts directly to an individual teacher are awkward, but it's probably not a big deal for a couple hundred bucks.

Knowing that parents are giving $1K gifts to teachers in some private schools makes me glad I am not part of that world. Though for all I know a few parents at our school did so.

happyjuice8000 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 10:58 am

DoubleComma wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 9:52 amIf there is a limit, unlikely that is something we would know vs you simply asking the school administration.

DW is a teacher, the gifts she enjoys the most are things that benefit her class room and a note. For example a gift card to Lakeshore Learning, Target, or other store where teachers are often buying classroom supplies directly. If you provided something like this, in my opinion the limit would be different than if you were giving the teacher cash or a restaurant gift card. I would expect nearly no limit if it directly benefits the classroom and students.

My question for you, is your understanding of this teachers comp accurate? Is there a reason for it, does she not have to be credentialed at this private school? Certainly there are schools that pay less and others that pay more, but $40k for what you describe is crazy low for the VHCOL areas I am familiar with. I don't see how this private school can be sustainable if teachers are being paid 50% of comparable public school teachers (I'm thinking of CA teacher comp).

I just went based on an ad posted for a full-time certified teacher at the school. I googled what the national average is. Here is what I found....

"Full-time teachers in public schools earned about 30 percent more than private school teachers, pulling in an average annual base salary of $61,600, compared with $46,400, according to the survey from the National Center for Education Statistics."

National averages don’t generally represent VHCOL areas.

hmw wrote: ↑Tue Nov 22, 2022 10:52 pmMy 11-year old goes to a private elemenary school. One of the parents is organizing to buy some group Xmas gifts for 4 teachers who teach the kids. I asked her what the suggested amount should be but she wouldn't give me a straight answer.

I am thinking about $25 to $50 per teacher so somewhere between $100 to $200 altogether. Am I in the right ball park?

Thanks

I have no idea. Private school, if you are paying 12K per year, $100-$200 doesn't seem like that much.
My kids went to public schools and there is no way you could expect many parents with a couple kids in school to come up with that amount of money.
I'd be more inclined to give each teacher a $25 gift card directly if I was going that route.

Cash is King wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 11:32 am

miamivice wrote: ↑Tue Nov 22, 2022 11:23 pm$0 per teacher

^ This.

Same here. Tipping teachers and teachers accepting tips is an obvious conflict of interest.

If grades are already in? $25.

If grades aren't in yet? $100.

YMMV.

vnatale wrote: ↑Wed Dec 20, 2023 11:17 pmIs my understanding correct that, in general, private school teachers are paid less than public school teachers? They do not belong to any teachers' unions?

In my state private school teachers don't have to be trained as teachers/no certification required. Some are, many are not. I never understood why someone would pay 12K to have their kid taught by someone not trained to teach.